Saturday, March 29, 2008

parents of the year

Where to start, where to start...

Gene and I both had interesting experiences taking the kids to school yesterday. I leave first and take Logan. Gene takes Kaylin. As Logan and I were walking out the door, I was saying goodbye to Kaylin (who was curled up in a chair eating breakfast and watching tv.) She was wearing tights with no skirt and I teased her "Remember to put on a skirt before you leave." We both laughed and I left.

Logan and I got into the car and I started backing up when Logan hollered "MOM! You did it again! Show me your leg!!!" What? My leg? What's wrong? "You had your leg sticking out the car door when you slammed it!!! DID YOU CUT IT OFF OR NOT?!?!?" Now I start laughing and he gets really furious. Um, Logan, don't you think if I cut my leg off with the car door I'd be screaming in pain and not happily driving down the street? "SHOW ME!!!!!" At this point I kind of bounced both knees up and down, hoping he'd be able to see. Did you see? "YOUR ARM'S IN THE WAY!!!!!" So, I lift my arm and bounce my legs again until he's satisfied. Easier said than done while you're trying to drive :)

Yeah. I have no idea where that came from. Maybe he had a nightmare? Whatever. He was happy by the time we drove the 1.5 miles to his school.

Gene was rushing around, gathering his stuff for work when Kaylin took her stuff for the Y daycamp (Spring Break) and went out to the van. Gene drove her to the Y and was signing her in for the day when he looked up and realized she wasn't wearing a skirt, just tights and shoes. Actually, that's not quite right- he looked up when he heard her friends teasing her that she forgot her skirt. Poor guy was so flustered about what the teachers must think of HIM that he left Kaylin there skirtless and ran home for clothes. Fifteen minutes later...

LOL!!! Kaylin didn't seem too hurt (or affected in any way, really) by the ordeal. I didn't get a phone call at work so apparently the Y didn't turn us in to child services :)

THEN, Kaylin lost a tooth last night while at Steak and Shake with my parents. They got home past MY bedtime and I was too tired to think about Tooth Fairy money. I got up at 3:45am to do my Tooth Fairy duty and realized I have absolutely NO cash. Gene had a $10 bill. NO! I'm NOT giving my kid $10 for a tooth! I scrounged and scrounged for money. I was even going to "borrow" money from Logan (or even Kaylin) but I couldn't find any. I finally dug up four quarters and a dollar coin. Debit cards. Who carries cash anymore? The Tooth Fairy, I guess.

Monday, March 24, 2008

spring break

Kaylin is on Spring Break this week so she was home with me today. Logan had his Kindergarten physical at 10:30am and desperately needed a haircut so I kept him home as well. When I checked in at the doctor's office, they unexpectedly handed me a cup. I had NO IDEA he was gonna need to give a urine sample. Wow. I expected things to get ugly fast.

Logan was happily playing in the play area when I broke the news. He looked at me like I was completely out of my mind. I told him I was serious. "Yeah, but... NO!!! That's disgusting!!!!" We walked slowly to the bathroom. He did the deed and peed in the cup, but he looked at me the whole time like I was playing a terrible joke. The rest of the physical went well other than he still has fluid in both ears and is back on 10 days of antibiotics. This doctor was convinced that with his age and the fact winter is over, he will NOT end up needing tubes. Yippee, I hope! He has a recheck in 6 weeks (rolling eyes.)

We had another Google moment in WalMart this morning. Kaylin saw an in-store hanging advertisement and wanted to know why pin cushions are shaped like tomatoes? One of the explanations involved an old superstition about placing a ripe tomato on your mantel the first time you entered a new house for luck and prosperity. During the seasons ripe tomatoes were unavailable, a cloth tomato was substituted and then used as a pin cushion. There ya go! Free information you never knew you wanted to know.

Ugh. Six screaming kids just ran in the front door. Spring Break... Sigh.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

i heart google

How did we ever get our useless, silly questions answered before Google? I mean, if your kid asks you Abe Lincoln's middle name or how many eggs in a ptarmigan clutch you can find out in about 10 seconds. Before Google, what, you put on your shoes and coats, drove to the library and researched this stuff? I doubt it. I'm assuming you just kept wondering...

I spent about 2 minutes the other day researching my beloved Zingers and found that they are currently made by BOTH Hostess and Dolly Madison. Both bakeries are owned by the same parent company. Phew! Imagine my emotional distress pre-Google when I would have had to hope for the best regarding my favorite snack cake! Hard times, the olden days.

Monday, March 17, 2008

introverts vs. extroverts???

A while back, someone close to me stated that I'm too shy to do something I considered to be an important personal accomplishment. I hadn't thought about being shy for many, many years. I found this accusation to be ridiculous and absurd. While I went on to prove the "shysayer" wrong and accomplish my goal, I never forgot the accusation and have since spent some time researching introversion, shyness and extroversion.

As a kid, I was always told that I was shy. I accepted that as fact, but now wonder how true it really was. I imagine I was a shy little kid. I can remember hating when adults got loud and in my face. I REALLY hated the ones that once they realized they scared me, kept trying and trying until I was so uncomfortable my entire outing was ruined by anticipating their return. I watched Logan suffer through this exact situation this weekend.

We walked into a Fuddrucker's restaurant and right up to the order taker. Logan had no trouble whatsoever placing his own order and answering any questions asked. That was all stuff he expected. What freaked him out was when a very friendly older gentleman employee (who obviously LOVED kids) unexpectedly approached Logan and very loudly and enthusiastically greeted him, asked him a pointless question and wanted a high five. Logan was totally overwhelmed and turned his head away and hid behind a pillar. I smiled and shrugged at the guy and he went off to do his work. BUT, he kept coming to our table to bug Logan. Logan was so upset he could hardly eat. He just kept looking around, keeping an eye on the whereabouts of the "scary guy." It was so ridiculous I was serioulsy considering LYING to the guy and telling him Logan was autistic or something so he'd leave him alone. Instead, I kept reassuring Logan that this guy was only trying to be nice and had no idea how much he was upsetting him. I told Logan he'd probably keep coming back to our table and bugging him, but that he REALLY wasn't trying to be mean. We watched as he did the same thing to many other kids and Logan eventually understood that this guy was a harmless nutjob. He was relieved when we left the restaurant. He then had no trouble interacting with the adults at the Ikea play area and made several "friends" while he was there. So, is he actually shy, or is he just a normal introvert who is overwhelmed by loud people unexpectedly getting in his face and invading his space???

Introverts are not shy. We're just more concerned with our own thoughts than what is going on around us. We are perfectly happy and even energized by being alone. I very much enjoy time with my friends, lunches with coworkers and hanging out watching tv with my family. I also enjoy time to myself. I LOVE my job because I get to work outside by myself. I prefer to work out at the gym alone and it would never occur to me to call a friend to come with me to shop for groceries. I have no use for my cell phone other than the occasional emergency or perhaps calling home to see if we need bread. Again, it wouldn't occur to me to call someone "just to talk" while I'm wandering the aisles of Target.

Introverts are very independent because we enjoy being alone. We think before we speak. We see no point in small talk and most of us tend to avoid it. We are often deep in thought and are therefore surprised when some loud person unexpectedly brings us out of our head. I'm no longer "scared" by the extreme extroverts, but they do annoy me and I'll try to avoid them. I always prefer to email rather than talk on the phone- unless the phone call has an actual purpose.

I was surprised to find that introverts make up only about 30% of the population. We are a definite minority. I was also enlightened to read that extroverts have extreme difficulty understanding that introverts enjoy time alone. They interpret our behavior as antisocial or even arrogant.

While I certainly believe everyone (including me) has room for personal improvement, I have decided to embrace my introverted nature as the way I was meant to be. I will never feel bad about myself for not being an outgoing party animal or a whiz at small talk. I will do my best to never stereotype my son as "shy" or make him feel bad about the personality he was born with. Instead, we'll work together to understand the extreme extroverts and the situations where our introversion causes us to freeze like deer caught in headlights. I want Logan to realize that for the most part, being an introvert is a gift. I mean, I'm almost NEVER bored because I LIKE being with myself :)

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

two whiny whines

Yes, I WOULD like some cheese to go with my whine! (Mmmmm, cheese...)

Whine number one is about my haircut. I had my favorite haircut situation. The one where I get to the walk-in place right after opening and don't have to wait and am in and out in 15-20 minutes? Yeah, I love that. What I hated was watching all the little clumps of gray drop onto my black smock. That pretty much sucked. Yes, I know I've had plenty of gray for a while now, but this haircut the gray fell in abundance. Time to start having my hair colored :(

I'm incredibly cheap so one would probably assume I would attempt to color my own hair. One would be wrong. I have NO confidence in my ability to do any such thing! Therefore I have to come to acceptance that every haircut I get from now on will include an actual appointment and a good chunk of my day. Ugh. The girl at the walk-in place offered to color it right then, but I turned her down because I needed to let the bad news sink in. Sigh...

Whine number two is about Zingers. Just when I fall in love with their Hostess-y goodness, they go back to being made by Dolly Madison. Why? Why? Why? I haven't actually tried the Dolly version so for all I know they are EXACTLY the same. (Maybe Hostess and DM share the same factory now, who knows?) I just wanted to cry about it publicly.

Sunday, March 9, 2008

funeral madness

I have a terrible problem with laughing inappropriately. It's not something I can easily control no matter how hard I bite my cheeks, dig my fingernails into my hands and force myself to think about terrible things. Earlier this week we had a gun safety class at work and I got the giggles when the police officer running the meeting told a room full of (mainly) women who don't like guns that there is NO WAY we can hurt the shotgun and demonstrated how to "unjam" the gun by banging it on the table repeatedly. I mean, I've always been afraid the gun would hurt ME! I've never even given a thought to hurting the gun. It was funny to me and I laughed.

Not a big deal at an informal meeting, but laughing at a funeral is NOT cool! Saturday morning I went to Jenny's dad's funeral with Evil Tara. I had to work before and after so we arrived at the tail end of the visitation and then were immediately seated for the funeral. Because we were on the late side, we were seated in front. The funeral began and was very nice and everything. The pastor asked us to rise and sing a hymn. Oh, "Blessed Assurance," I actually know this one! Tara and I rose to sing and this was when the trouble began...

The man directly behind me began bellowing in a baritone operatic vibrato. Though there was organ accompanyment and the organist was leading the singing, Mr. Warbler was on his own time and pretty much his own tune. It was completely unexpected! It struck me as WAY too funny. This was seriously some of the worst singing I've ever heard. Tara knows perfectly well I have a problem with laughing and spent the remainder of the song egging me on. Wow. I was about ready to explode. There were FOUR hymns throughout the funeral. It was BAD. I'm surprised I didn't need to stop at the ER on the way back to work to have my cheeks sutured. As if the singing wasn't bad enough, Mr. Charlton Heston wannabe kept hollering out "Amen!" or "Praise Jesus!" in his resonant, warbling voice.

Tara, I'm never going to another funeral with you! LOL!

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

steppin' out

One morning as I was walking into the Riverplex to run, I paused for a few seconds to watch a step aerobics class. There were only about 5 people in the class and two of them were very large women. It looked really fun and I thought "If those two can do it, I can do it." I kept walking past the class on Tuesdays and Thursdays, noting that the two women kept showing up.

This Tuesday, I finally decided to give the class a try. I've never considered myself particularly coordinated, but I didn't realize I'm completely UNcoordinated! It was an hour of confusion, but somehow it was also a blast! I laughed at myself the entire time. We had a short water break in the middle of class. The two women I had been watching for a few weeks noticed the new person and came over to give me some encouragement. They told me "Hang in there. There's no way you could possibly be worse than us."

It took all of my self control not to tell them that they were my inspiration for joining the class :)

Sunday, March 2, 2008

finished with training

I had my final session with my personal trainer today :D I don't have any pain yet, so hopefully it won't be too bad. I think I learned enough to continue some weight training without being pushed. As for balancing on the platform on top of a balloon thingy while lifting weights or stepping repeatedly onto a weight bench- probably ain't gonna happen! I learned how to stretch after my workouts and got all my running questions answered. I don't know that I'd recommend this experience to anyone else, but I'm glad I did it. Mostly, I'm glad it's over!

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The formerly white socks and underwear Logan wore under his new jeans were blue. I'm now 100% convinced that my little boy isn't suffering from old lady circulatory issues. Now I'll just have to remember to keep reminding daycare that his blue legs are from his jeans. And remember to always wash his jeans in the dark towel load!

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We traded in the crappy Hyundai wagon and got a new Dodge minivan. That means I'm back to driving my good ole Geo. Better gas mileage, A/C and (most conveniently at this time of year) windshield washer fluid!!! I have no desire to drive the new van- too much pressure to keep it clean. No thanks! Gene (for some reason I fail to comprehend) felt guilty that he gets the shiny new vehicle and I get the '97 junker so he took the old car and washed the outside and thoroughly cleaned the inside. Probably the last time that will happen :)